Last night, I was treated to romantic dinner at a swanky Mediterranean restaurant and instead of indulging in rich conversation and intimacy, we spent the majority of the time stalking a young straight couple at the table across from us.
The girl was what I like to refer to as "goofy cute": Moderately attractive but with a some goofy features/ characteristics that kind of knock her down from a firm 7 to about a 6 on the 1 to 10 scale of hotness. In her case, her teeth were kind of jacked up, she had a soccer mom haircut, and she was wearing a fucking turtleneck sweater on a date! The guy had a very nerdy appearance: Glasses, side swept gelled hair, a button-down shirt that was too tight, and old man loafers.
An ~artistic interpretation~ of what I saw.
By analyzing their body language and interactions, I could assess that this was a first date but they had probably known each other (co-workers, friend of a friend, online dating services) prior that evening.
Though we were not close enough to their table to hear their conversation, we used that to our advantage and narrated their story for our entertainment.
There was a lot of drink sipping and forced chuckles whenever they were stuck in a puddle of awkward silence. There was a good amount of eye-contact aversion on the girl's part. I noticed the guy's foot fidgeting when the belly-dancer shimmied her way toward their table and how desperately he tried not to even turn his neck to even stretch in case she was just around the corner. (The belly dancer was unbelievably hot btw. My guy and I were even ogling at dat ass)
The only thing that could have made it any better would be humorous thought bubbles, "Blind Date" style.
It's difficult to remain inconspicuous when you're literally spying on someone who is a mere 10 feet away from you, but we got away with it unnoticed. I don't know how to end this post.